what is this?

okay, that's not my normal way of starting a post, but still... i'm supposed to be doing my theory... argh... the weather is reflecting my mood - it's raining. *sighs* everyone's feeling down now, no? *sighs* anyway, today was fun. seriously. school. went to class to put th box. thn ibc... um. class. doing word search. um. let me think. thn PE... BUT. we didn't go PE. we had some science experiment. yup. about extracting DNA. it was funfunfun. i touched th DNA. wow~! okay. class. um. um. jiayi & maxine playing stress. yup. & i was... let me think. slacking. LOL. thn went to alethea's place. they were playing connect4. thn i played with jieyun. yup. & thn halfway th thingy toppled & thn we were like 'nooo'. LOL. & thn she threw her red-colored (mine was yellow) slot at me. yup. & it hit me & i was like 'err... what hit me?' LOL. & jieyun was like 'hahahaha!' & thn i threw a slot back at her. yeah, thn we started throwing at each other. um. thn... recess. funny. i was queuing to

buy my food thn jieyun pulled me out fr th queue and was like 'you no brain cell person, let th smarter ones buy first lah!' & i was like 'arghhh. let go of me, you cuckoo person.' & we were arguing about th slot-throwing thingy. yup. thn when she bought her watermelon, i was like tugging on her hand & saying 'don't eat first lah, let th other people eat first.' and she was like trying to bite me. hahaha. thn she did the same to me whn i was trying to eat. thn she shake my hand until i drop th fishball:D thn... yup. jiayi & maxine were like 'orh horh... pay...' hahaha. thn jieyun gave me $1. and jiayi & max were like 'SPLIT. SPLIT.' LOL. hahhaa. um. class. lina doing HGM agn... haiyoh. i ran off to hide in th toilet because i was boredboredbored. haha. thn... play, slack &... try to sleep. *sighs* same section as ytd...


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Dear 33,
I don't know why i'm doing this again. yesterday i went to the swings. i kept swinging for 20minutes straight. & i realised i was late.. and i ran home and cried. i cried and stayed in my room. after that i was so tired from thinking about you, i was so tired and weak. i felt as if i didn't know you anymore... your cool reception towards me is killing me. we're like strangers now, we don't even exchange basic greetings, let alone are we able to talk about 12 and 17... why do you make me feel like that? why can't you just tell me tht it was a mistake? an unintentional mistake? or was it an intentional mistake? i can't take this anymore, why don't you stop walking away from me and tell all? why are you unable to stay by my side for even three minutes? why is it everytime we end up beside each other, you refuse to look at me, but you walk away? why are you doing this? do you feel guilty of something? i just know i don't blame you. i just want to know why you're avoiding me. i just want to go back to whn we could still talk to each other with ease... i miss talking to you... i miss chatting with you. i miss laughing with you. i miss everything about you. why can't you just tell me? why are you avoiding me? why do you leave me with so many questions? you know i dont want to leave here with regrets.. you know i don't want to leave here with broken friendships. why do you make me regret being your friend? you know i don't want to regret being your friend. you know that i like being your friend and that i enjoy being your friend. why do you make me regret it now? i don't want to regret it, but i'm gonna regret it if being friends with you makes me so tired and emotionally weak. i know that you hate it when i cry. that's why i'm forced to fake a smile whenever you're around, whenever you see me. i know i can't cry because crying's seen as weakness in your eyes. but i really want to cry, i don't want to put on a fake smile anymore. you're hurting me now, everytime you walk away from me you hurt me. everytime you walk away from me i die a little bit. please stop being this way... i miss you...

"All I want to go back, go back to the old times..."

-Janelle.

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also, i want to thank janellejanellejanelle.
really, she wrote this song (th quote above is from that song), which she used to cheer me up whn i was upset about idon'tthinkishouldsay. it's a real nice song, omg.

I found the stack of letters on my table,
The ones you used to write me,
The ones with all those painful memories.
Those are the ones I can't bear to read...

Here I go again,
moping over your leaving my side.
The days with you were nice,
But I see now, the meaning of "Friendships don't last".

All I wanna do is go back,
Back to those old times.
The times where we would giggle and chase each other,
Laughing at ourselves doing wacky things.
All I wanna do is go back to those old times,
Go back to those old times...

I feel like burning up your letters,
But I can't seem to.
There's still a place for you in my aching heart.
A place I can't seem to cover up.

I still can't face the fact that you lied to me.
Wait, maybe you didn't,
maybe you did...

I can't seem to erase you completely from my life.
The lighter's in my hand,
the sheaf of letters in the other.
I can't bring myself to burn them.

All I wanna do is go back,
Back to those old times.
The times where we would giggle and chase each other,
Laughing at ourselves doing wacky things.
All I wanna do is go back to those old times,
Go back to those old times...

"I'll walk down that lonely road with you"
"You won't be alone, I'll always be here for you."
Now that I look back,
I realise these words were weightless,
Empty promises weighing feather-light.

All I wanna do is go back,
Back to those old times.
The times where we would giggle and chase each other,
Laughing at ourselves doing wacky things.
All I wanna do is go back to those old times,
Go back to those old times...




i read it. and i felt like this song represented how i feel back thn when i was upset too. so really, manymmanymanythanks, Janelle. okay, so i just brought up a muffin. not just. um. quite some time ago. thn it smelf like a banana muffin. urgh. and i didn't eat it. oh well, too bad. hahaha. okay. so i got to do my theory. if not i'm dead. seriously. a dead person. okay. so sorry!
oh, and by the way, anyone knows whose email is blueygurl_idiotic.myuk@hotmail.com ?
seriously. th person just added me on msn for nth. okayokay. so i gotta go. byes!

DAPHNE.
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